Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Risky Business


blatant misconduct

Accused of price changing.  
He thought I was a purloiner.

I couldn't believe it.  
Boy, was my face red!

I didn't know what to say upon said accusal.

Stammering and puzzled was all I had.

I mean, why would I change a price tag?

I was standing there with $300 in my Marc Jacobs wallet, two credit cards and an ATM card with access to $6000.00 in my checking account.

I'm pretty much lying about that paragraph.

I'm the chick that stops for stray dogs lost on the highway.
I over tip bad wait people because I feel sorry for them.
I carry $5 bills at Christmas, to give to my kids for the kettle ringers.  Every. single. one. we. see.
I send money to St Jude Children's Hospital.
I donate to animal shelters.
I pray for strangers.

I know, right?  
Why would I change a price tag.
Maybe he knew that
Generosity is not always my nature.
Maybe he knew that sometimes I'm stingy.
Like when the Nazi home room moms buy a
$200 gift for the teachers birthday present,
 then send out multiple emails asking 
the rest of us peon moms to cough up.
 I'm not ashamed to admit 
I anonymously sent in $2 and said a 
prayer for Mrs. Slapmyknuckles to have a good day.

Which I'm glad I did, because I may need money 
for a lawyer some day.
One that can get me out of price altering.

You see, it all started when my crafty friend and I went thrifting.
Thrifting at the Salvation Army Store.
Looking for inspiration for our
crafting ideas.  
The entire reason I started this blog.
It's a New Year, time to take action.

Thankfully, the manager of the Salvation Army 
store we were at, believed me.
Believed that I did not alter the price of a vase.
That I didn't put a yellow sticker saying $1.99 
over a red sticker reading $2.99.

I bought it anyway.
I'll take the extra buck from the $3 I have allotted for the teachers end of year gift.

Sometimes you have to say *What the F*&#*

*as quoted by Tom Cruise in risky business*

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